Well, it’s been quite a while since I’ve written anything for the internet, but I’m going to do my best to be at least somewhat interesting. I have a lot of thoughts and ideas in my head, it’s just a matter of extracting them, organizing them, and presenting them in as clean a fashion as I can. But that’s what I do. I am a janitor, after all.
Sitting here in my little closet for all of eternity has really given me time to think. It’s difficult to understand many things that happen around the world each day. Even with all the the time I have to do nothing but sit and think about things, I still can’t figure it out.
Right now there is a spider crawling across my desk. Obviously, it’s on a mission. It has a goal in mind, and it is dedicated to achieving that goal. I’m not really sure what that goal is, probably to find a good place for a web or something. But one thing is for certain. SMACK!! It’s all over, now. Everything that spider ever lived for is now sitting in a mess of guts on my desk. And I have to clean my desk now, too. But there are many questions to be asked here.
Why did I do that? I don’t know. It was just bothering me, really. I don’t like things crawling across my desk. It’s my desk, and it has my stuff on it. I don’t want spider cooties on my stuff. Plus, as a child, I was taught to dislike spiders and to smash them whenever I see them.
Would it have hurt me to let the spider live? Nah. It was just a tiny thing. It wasn’t a black widow or anything like that. Maybe it would have bitten me and I’d have a little itchy bump for a while. Or maybe I would have inhaled it tonight while I slept, in which case I just did us both a favor.
Do I feel bad? Hell no. The best kind of spider is a dead one. Spiders are icky, and they aren’t good for anythi– Dammit, I wish these flies would stop buzzing around my head!
Is this going to stop other spiders from crawling across my desk? Probably not. I mean, come on. Spiders are ignorant.
In the ideal situation, the spider and I would have acknowledged each other, and then each of us would have gone about our business. We both had our own things to do, and it was definitely possible for us both to do them without getting in each other’s way. But for some reason I felt it was my right and my duty to smash it into itsy bitsy spider pieces.
There’s really nothing wrong with that, is there?